Things I'm thankful for. Not people, places, or animals...but things. Things!
I as a capitalistic pig American infidel love things. I am thankful for these things. I love things, need things, want things. Somethings, and everything. Thingamajigs and watchamacallits. Things that make you go hmmmm. I see you baby, shakin that thing!
I'm thankful for:
TV Remote Control - saving my muscles for pumping iron instead.
Orange Juice - Pulp please.
Almond Joys - melt them, put them in a vanilla shake and you have nectar of the gods.
Atlas Shrugged - Whenever I'm done....Rand kicks my ass to get moving.
Nitro - cheap and sexy like you.
Softball - I could play it everyday.
Hockey - Tis the season.
Football - I bow to thee my lord.
Digital Cameras - Redeye begone!
Myspace - ugly but very nice people.
Jump Drives - So long CD, alas I hardly knew ya.
9thX.com - finally a site where I can make money while I sleep.
Boxer Briefs - Chicks dig it.
Contact lens solution - I'd be bumming without it
Apple Pie - I love pie!
Bill of Rights - Check out this version.
U.S. Constitution - Ron Paul!
Hilary Clinton's platform - it validates how right I am.
Tailgating - Like a picnic in the park.
Sirrius Radio - Patriot Talk 144.
Fig Newtons - just 10 arent enough.
Wool socks - wooly booly.
Treo 300w - wish it could cook.
Green Tea - 1 cup a day keeps white teeth away.
History Channel - Modern Marvels teaches me.
Sicilian Olives - You love my complexion.
Raddichio - the most underrated vegetable of all time.
The Line - I just crossed it.
NFL Films soundtrack - play this on a date and she's butter in your hands.
Wind - it helps me get rid of my leaves.
November - no not really, I can't stand it.
Wine - with some fontina cheese
Women in boots - just like hats.
Key Chains - imagine the chaos without them.
Garbage cans - nuff said.
Wallet - without one I'd have a purse!
Spearmint gum - Addiction
Online banking - no more stamps.
Capicola - oh baby.
My pillow - nothing is closer to me.
Chic peas - with pepper and celery salt
Garlic salt - on everything.
Websites - sportsline, drudgereport, liberalscum,
Dollar stores - load up on shampoo and napkins.
F18's - wow.
Long sleeve tshirts - comfortable and functional.
Eggplant - miss it.
Youtube - fast becoming a guilty pleasure.
Global Warming - good, the cold weather blows.
Gmail - my third arm.
Corona - Not a beer drinker, but this hits the spot.
Money - need more.
Ketchup Pringles - tasty.
Cocoa Puffs - I'm cuckoo for them.
Shwarma - chicken.

What things are you thankful for??