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Truth: Herman - Dear Kellogg

Dear Kellogg,

My children, Shawn (8) and Parker (6), are weathering their formative years. I have always taught them to be selfless, to share, and above all, to get along. One day, I’m going to be grabbing myself a big ol’ dirt nap, and I don’t want the kids arguing over the Herman estate.

I’ve noticed lately that they are possessive. They fight over their soccer ball. The last of the pudding, the television clicker. It never ends. I discipline them. I ground them. But they still bicker.

I think I figure out our problem. Each and every morning, they fill their bellies with delicious, and more importantly, nutritious Eggo waffles. The flavors may change, but the brand remains the same. Each and every morning, they can be heard yelling the same thing at the top of their lungs!”

Not “Love Thy Neighbor.”
Not “Blessed is he who is meek and humble, he will inherit the earth.”
Not “Thou shall not covet thy neighbor’s ass.”

Instead, “Leggo my Eggo!”

Yes, it’s cute. It harkens back to my childhood. But no doubt, it has started more than one dorm room squabble. It screams “Greed is Good!”

Ever think of changing your slogan? Something like “Let’s split that last Eggo, Even Steven.” Set a good example. Maybe then, less pimple-faced pinheads would be seen coyly sneaking out of grocery stores with cereal boxes in their crotches.

Until I see a new slogan, I think I’m going to serve mush. It was good enough for Spanky and Alfalfa. It’s good enough for Parker and Shawn. And nobody ever fought over mush.

Sincerely,

Jerry Herman
---------------------------------------------------------------
Consumer Affairs 020136125A
From: kellogg@casupport.com

Sent: Wed 5/06/09 10:32 PM
To: Jerry Herman
Mr. Herman,

Thank you for contacting our company regarding the advertising for Kellogg's® Eggo® waffles. We sincerely appreciate your interest.

Viewer reaction, such as yours, is helpful to us and taken into consideration when developing future advertisements. Your concerns have been forwarded to the appropriate company officials and we hope future ads for this and our other products will be more acceptable to you.

Again, thank you for sharing your views and interest in our company.


Sincerely,


Consumer Affairs Department
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