H O C K E Y D I N O

I have to be honest. Halloween is not my thing. It hasn't been since I was a kid. I don't know why, I just don't care. I don't hate it or dislike it. I just don't get it. It's great for kids. For adults, the costume thing is fun I guess. Hey, why do girls slut it up for Halloween anyways? Explain that one to me.

I'm not much into horror movies or that kind of thing either. My only fascination comes with my favorite monsters - Boo Berry, Count Chocula, FrankenBerry, Yummy Mummy, and Fruit Brute. Boo Berry is the best and you know it.

Top 10 Candy Bars According to Me. Don't argue, because you really don't know what you are talking about if you tried. I'm a part time candy pimp. You want something done? Give me candy and we can talk. That's how I roll. Not how I tootsie roll, but roll. However I'm going to let you give me number 10. Humor me.

Don't even tell me Snickers or 3 Muskateers or Milky way. They are the same and boring!

1. Aero
2. Wonka Bar
3. Reece's Peanut Butter Cups
5. Coffee Crisp
4. Almond Joy
6. Nestle Crunch
7. Kit Kat
8. M&M's
9. Watchamacallit
10.


hmmmm, one of these????
Heath - Whoppers - Symphony - Ghiradelli dark - 100 Grand - Butter finger - Toberlone - Godiva - PayDay - Chunky - Oh Henry - Tootsie Roll - Baby Ruth - Zero - Take 5 - Krackel - Mr. Goodbar - Marathon - Mounds - Twix - Herehey - Kiss - Carmello - Krunch - Junior Mints - Milk Duds - 5th avenue - Mallo Cups - bit o honey - Raisinets - Goobers - Nutrageous - Dove - Mars - Skor - York Peppermint Patty - Clark - Zagnut - Rolo - Powerhouse - Mr. Goodbar - Powerhouse -

Let's see what you got. Feel free to send me one as well. A blogger has to eat ya know. Where's the love?

Why do women dress provocatively for Halloween? It used to be people would dress up as something scary or as something funny for Halloween. Now it seems, a majority of women dress provocatively for parties and what not. Why? I'm not complaining and I am surely not saying it is wrong. However now it's odd if a women dresses for Halloween and she inst dressed like that. At what point in time did this become the norm? I think I maybe Elvira on the scence might have started this trend, but I'm not sure.

I know many guys who all of a sudden loved to go to Halloween parties just for this reason alone [guilty as charged]. They talk about it, look forward to it. Facebook and myspace are loaded with pictures of girls scantily clad in their Halloween garb. I'm trying to understand the reasoning why it's OK to do this one time a year, and not other times? I mean would they dress this way for any costume party, or a Mardi Gras party? Maybe..probably.

I've been to parties where the hoochies came out, and I didn't know those girls were hoochies until Halloween. How do you look at them the same after that?

What am I chopped liver? I've always wondered where that saying came from. I'm not a fan of liver, but I know folks who like it. Anyways here's the deal I'm getting at. Whenever I'm with folks out in public, and we meet their friends or family...I'm hardly if ever introduced. This has been happening for years on end mind you! What am I chopped liver? Am I invisible? Is there a sign on me that says NOT HERE? It has happened with different people, so it's not like it is something new.

I don't know what the deal is, but more often than not...I'm just there as if I don't exist. Does it make me mad? No. I do find it weird though. I must be providing some sense of being "an old shoe" or "an old hat"; a level of comfort perhaps? Just one of the guys, or chameleon like and blends in with everything. Crazy I say.

I'm pretty quiet in public so that could be part of the problem I'm sure. Even in the workplace I've been in meeting where managers have forgotten I was there during introductions. I've had to raise my hands or interject of my existence. Certainly I've had people approach me and ask me who I am. I just usually say DINO. No last name, no title, that's it DINO. Like a Brazilian soccer star with one name. Yeah that's it. How could they miss that?

For Halloween I'm going as the invisible man. Here's a picture of me in costume:







Nice huh?

Recently I asked if you kept something from someone, if it was considered lying or not. I asked if honesty was the best policy. I received many mixed answers to both- many said yes, always it's best to not keep things to yourself. Many said no, because you could hurt someone if they knew the truth.

Well is it lying then if you aren't telling the truth? No matter how justifiable it is, it's still lying right?

A friend of mine is a hound. He is married and has the eyes constantly on the chicas. He doesn't do anything, but he sure looks and acts like it he does. Yet around the wife, naturally he's on his best behavior. A regular Ward Cleaver to say the least.

So since he isn't being honest about how he is, and who is is, does that mean he is a liar? It's not like she is asking him. But he isn't being truthful to who he is when she isn't around. He is omitting the truth.

If he told her the truth, she'd probably be upset or hurt. He feels justified in not telling her. He's justified in keeping the peace, but he's lying. Yet, would anyone call him a liar? Probably not. He just omits the truth. Is this acceptable? Come on, be honest.

Things I notice...

I notice if people clip their nose hairs or not.

I notice if people sniffle...I immediately think they are allergic to food.

I notice people who smell like cigarettes, even when they try to hide it..it's still there...I find it offensive.

I notice that squirrels who run in front of a car, usually always try to go back where they started from. I think they are nuts.

I notice when chicks don't carry a purse. That just bothers me for some reason. I don't know why.

I notice when restaurant people pick up dirty glasses by the top.

I notice when people talk with food in their mouth.

I notice incorrectly spliced scenes on television and movies.

I notice movie extras and how blatantly unreal they seem in movies or television.

I notice people don't come by to visit my desk when my candy jar is empty.

I notice that everyone who drives a Harley seems to have gray hair for some reason.

I notice that you can spot a hunter just by the fact they wear a carhart jacket.

I notice that guys that chew tobacco spit alot, and aren't usually happy people.

I notice that when I blog about politics, alot the people get mad at me for doing so.

I notice that when I don't blog about politics, half the people get mad at me for doing so.

I notice people think I withhold information, when that's completely the opposite.

I notice that when my fridge is empty, I seem to visit it more often.

I notice that I don't drink water enough.

I notice that the pet industry sucks.

I notice that most people with a tattoo need to show it off.

I notice that I'd be lost without my calculator.

I notice that when all is said and done, more is said than done.

I notice that people use LOL and ROFLMAO way too much and it's making me mad.

I notice that softball players expect their manager to run things unless they disagree with the decisions.

I notice that the Fox NFL pregame show is a complete waste of time.

I notice that local sports teams pregame and post game shows are a complete waste of time.

I notice that people who are dependant on coffee have a weakness in their character.

I notice that the flavor of gum never lasts very long.

I notice that I notice things.

A sketch of me from a co-worker

I remember being in 5Th grade and always staring at the clock. I wanted to see how many minutes I could go without blinking. I used to stare out the window and wonder what would I do if a gangster 1940's car drove by and guys with Tommy guns would shoot at the windows. I recall staring at the windows when birds would crash into it them, then fall to the ground. I remember thinking about how many more years of school I had left.

I don't know if I day dream allot, or it's just my A.D.D. kicking in making me go from one topic to the next? I just don't know. I do multi-task and end up doing many thing in the course of an hour while at the same time drift off to nowhere.

I often wonder who I even get from point A to point B in my car when I have no recollection of the entire trip. My mind is elsewhere. Heck when I'm pitching in the middle of a softball game, I have to force myself to focus on the current hitter because I'm often thinking about the batting order for next inning and other things.

I'm a creature of habit, perhaps a bad one.


!

Former basketball great and the guy who always talks in the third person, Michael Jordan has a problem. His son is going to play for UCF. The problem, UCF has an agreement with ADIDAS for their shoes. Jordan's kid will only wear NIKE because of the business relationship with his father over the years. I'm thinking UCF will probably have a new agreement with NIKE.

My real issue is this. Who friggin cares about shoes like this? I know many people have been shot over what kind of athletic shoes (I still call them tennis shoes by the way)people wear. I know people think it's a big deal if they get Nike Air Jordan's. I wouldn't be caught dead wearing Air Jordan's out of principal. I could care less about Adidas or Diadora or whatever is out there. I buy shoes that feel good or are inexpensive. I'm not blowing $100 on a pair of shoes, where that money goes to pay Michael Jordan. Are you nuts? What's the point?

What's wrong with you sheeple who buy products because of certain athletes or athletic programs? You are no better than NASCAR sheep who support every product a driver endorses. Get a clue. Get a life.

Dear HockeyDino
My employer seems to be nit-picking me.Now, I want to do a good job and do not mind constructive criticism. I am always wanting to improve. But it seems that the mole hills of small details are becoming mountains and it's like she is searching for the errors I make.

This morning before I had my coat off I was asked to print some day schedules (2 out of 5) that were missing . Yes, the fact that the sheets were missing is my fault and it needed to be corrected, but in the big picture, it's a small detail, easily corrected. No one is perfect after all [except you are pretty darn close].

I have noticed that she has begun a list of my errors. So today I began my own list that I will bring out when needed. I thought I would start to document all errors I notice, including my own, along with how that error was corrected. We are after all a team. I do correct the mistakes others make, and don't usually bring it to any one's attention, I just fix it.

What are your thoughts on such a practice, keeping a list of all errors. I suppose I ought to balance it with the good things people do.

Signed,

Nit Picked

___________________________________

Dear Nit Picked,
Going toe to toe with your boss isn't a good idea, if it's your sole boss. If your boss has a higher boss, then you have a shot. Nothing worse than an employee going over a manager's head to the next level for that manager. Anyways I'll assume it' just one person you have to deal with. You are pretty much screwed no matter what you do. If you ignore it, your boss will always find faults. If you confront them with their mistakes, you've begun a war. A non-productive war that you will not win.
Keep trying to be a positive worker, change your approach so they feel appreciated as a boss, and they may lay off on the nit picking.

Or take some compromising photos, duct tape their phone, put a tack on their seat, put plastic wrap on the toilet seat. Your days are numbered, have some fun.

Sincerely,

HockeyDino



What do you guys think?

This is my current requirements list for a girlfriend-wife.

Feminine
Beautiful
Hot
Sexy
Dresses nice
Thin
Pretty
Nice Eyes
Strong family values
Can Cook a variety of foods
Can bake like crazy
Same interests
Good taste in decor
Good taste in music
Non smoker
Doesn't care for talking sports
Respects my love of sports
Supportive
Attentive
Nice voice
Affectionate
Good parent
Protective
Enjoys the outdoors
Gardener
Healthy
Smart
Catholic
Funny
Understands my jokes
Hip
Good Kisser
Protective
A bit shy
Interesting
Caring
Energetic
Creative
Prefers wine over beer
Resourceful
Thoughtful
Nice
Sweet Demeanor
Loyal
Honest
Truthful
Trusting
Open
Loving
Friend
Can tolerate my friends
Has a nice mom
Confidante
Non-Italian
Confident
Is not lazy
Wonderful
Doesnt watch reality tv
Accepting of A.D.D.
Polite
Frugal but not cheap
Loves children
Conversationalist
Outstanding morality

As I've gotten older the list gets smaller. I've since removed the following: Mute, Rich, Tattoos, Virgin, love eggplant

I recently helped work a Haunted Hayride to help raise money for a local community. The event went very well, and it was great fun. More fun then I thought I would have, not being a Halloween guy. However I have a new appreciation for the fun and effort that was involved.

Aside from the all goulish fun and stuff, there was seemingly one low point. That low point would happen often. It was when a hayride trailer would drive by and there were teenagers on there. Nothing to look forward to when they came around, because it seemed each one had to talk out loud as they drove by. Each one had to add their two cents and commentary. Each one had to comment how they weren't scared, or they would make some off the cuff remark. Rather than enjoy the atmosphere and what not, they just had to show off to their friends.

I don't get what they wanted to achieve, but it just proves their all freakin idiots. Is it a territory thing? Is it just some form of machismo? Where's the respect? I wanted so badly to drag them off the trailer and just yell at them.

Next year I'm hoping they only allow teenagers in with muzzles. Or at least give us the ability to pelt them with paintball filled balloons.

Gawking: to gape or stare stupidly

Recently I was having breakfast with some business partners. It was at a sports bar type restaurant. Everything was good, the food, the meeting, the company...very productive. However there was a waitress that wanted everyone to know she was pretty. It wasn't good enough I guess that she was pretty, she had to emphasize that by wearing a very low revealing top. It was pretty evident she knew what she was wearing, and what she was doing.

Needless to say, it became a topic. It just happens that way. But my interest was trying to figure out what this waitress was thinking. Does she make more money when she tramps it up? Do customers request her because how she dresses? What if she was the worst waitress in the world, would it matter?

I also noticed how guys were gawking. I found it interesting, not that they looked. But they didn't care if she saw them look. And she didn't care obviously that they were looking. Somewhere in this dynamic is probably a lack of class on both ends - the waitress and the guys looking. Who's really at fault here? The gawkers or the waitress reeling them in?

When teams win playoffs games, it drives me nuts how they celebrate. I just don't understand the mentality here. As a fan, I never understood either. Winning a playoffs game is very nice and surely desired. However winning the championship was what it is all about. Am I wrong here?

I see these teams winning division series, then dousing each other with champagne. They mob each other as if they've won it all. They ham it up for the camera, they cry, they carry their children on their shoulders. I just don't understand. I find it somewhat offensive being a sports fan.

If I was the manager or owner of a team, I would be pretty darn upset at such behavior. Until you win it all, you need to go to work. That's what you are paid to do. I side with the fans in celebrating the prospect of another victory, but not at celebrating a division championship or playoff game. I'm not knocking them for their exuberance...heck I've been there all to often over the years. Still though, I knew that winning it all was all that matters. Why don't the players feel this way?

"Winning isn't everything, it's the only thing" Vince Lombardi




Former President Richard Nixon gets his share of the locker room celebration after the California Angels defeated the Kansas City Royals to win the Western Division title of the American League as Angels second baseman Bobby Grich pours beer

There are some vital things everyone should know how to do...

Know what direction you are heading at all times N,S,E,W
How to set up camp
How to catch a fish
How to obtain drinking water in the dessert
How to change a flat tire
How to use a knife
How to cook a decent meal
Know the proper use of netiquette (Not LOL or ROFLMAO)
Know how to act in public
know when to say when
How to play catch
How to throw a baseball
How to throw a football correctly
How to grow a vegetable garden
How to chew
How to drive a stick shift
How to tip properly for service
How to take off a bra
How to sew a button
How to invest
How to spend
How to save
How to type a complete sentence
How to read
How to write a letter
How to balance a checkbook
How to slow dance
How to kiss
How to wrap a present
How to whistle
How to take a photo
how to say thank you
How to escape from a trunk of a car
How to tie down home made flying saucer in your yard
How to not crash and burn when you ask someone out
How to dress in public
How to work a computer
How to send an email
How to avoid being a sheep
How to shrug
How to take vitamins and minerals
How to take care of a cold
How to snap your fingers
How to make a music cd
How to deviate from the norm
How to read through political speak
How to tape a hockey stick
How to throw a Frisbee
How to go hiking
How to pick the right pair of shoes
How to trust
How not to trust certain people or situations
How to develop a sixth sense
How to rock
How to Roll
How to identify evil
How to love your country
How to be patriotic
How to keep an empty pop bottle in your car for long trips
How to fill out a donor card
Know Who your neighbors are and what they do
How to identity skanks and ho's
How to shy away from the haters
How to keep company
How to think critically
How to embrace your youth
How to respect the elderly
How to seize the moment
How to seize the day
How to attain goals
How to have hope
How to shoot a free throw
How to set a pick
How to play goalie
How to keep score at a baseball game correctly
How to take care of animals
How to chew with your mouth closed
How to debate effectively
How to parallel park
How to look at constellations
How to start a fire
How to put out a fire
How to work a lawn mower
How to catch a mouse
How to do laundry correctly
How to move it move it
How to dream a little dream
How to travel light
How to pay it forward

1 - Have you ever been asked out?
No

2 - Where was your default picture taken?
Canada

3 - What's your middle name?
Game

4 - Your current relationship status?
Attached

5 - Does your crush like you back?
Of course.

6 - What is your current mood?
Let me check my ring...it's black. Is that good?

7 - What color underwear are you wearing?
Navy blue

8 - What color shirt are you wearing?
white

9 - Missing something?
Pants

10 - If you could go back in time and change something, what would you do?
I would have saved more money

11 - If you could be an animal for one day what would you be?
A Lion. I would like to sleep 22 hours for a day.

12 - Ever had a near death experience?
Every day when I go on I-96

13 - Something you do a lot?
Daydream.

14 - The song stuck in your head?
Got To Get You In To My Life by The Beatles

15- Who did you copy and paste this from?
Becki R

16 - Name someone with the same birthday as you?
Vanessa Gravina. January 4, 1974. American.film, TV play and drama actress.

17 - When was the last time you cried?
April 1999, when Wayne Gretzky retired. A part of my youth went away.

18 - Have you ever sung in front of a large audience?
I am right now. GOT TO GET YOU INTO MY LIFE...

19 - If you could have one super power what would it be?
Well I'm tired of xray vision and being invisible. I'll settle for shooting people with laser shots from my eyeballs.

20 - What's the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
Face

21 - What do you usually order from Starbucks?
it's motor oil, never touch it.

22 - What's your biggest secret?
I watch HGTV

23 - Favorite color?
Quit asking me this. You just want me to say Periwinkle.

24 - Do you still watch kiddie shows or tv shows?
If Sponge Bob is on..I'll listen.

25 - What's on your walls?
Paints..pictures..hooks..scratches...nicks...holes...art..finger prints.

27 - Do you speak any other language?
Sicilian

28 - What's your favorite smell?
Napalm in the morning or vanilla

29 - Describe your life in one word?
Frustration

30 - Have you ever kissed in the rain?
No way.

31 - What are you thinking about right now?
Should I cut the grass or wait another week

33 - What should you be doing?
Cutting the grass

34 - Who was the last person that made you upset/angry?
A coworker

35 - How often do you talk to God?
Indirectly a few times a day. Directly when he can fit me in. Usually in April.

36 - Do you like working in the yard?
I hate cutting the grass, but I love the outdoors

37 - If you could have any last name in the world, what would you want?
Obama. I'd win awards and everyone would love me, and I wouldnt have to do anything but read from a teleprompter.

38 - Do you act differently around a person you have a crush on?
I drool more

39 - What is your natural hair color?
black

40 - Who was the last person to make you cry?
The Detroit Tigers. FRAUDS. I HATE THEM.

http://www.notickettax.com/

There's a movement in the state of Michigan legislature to add taxes to sporting events. The governor in her infinite wisdom along with some other lefties want to impose a 6% luxury tax.

STOP. I say STOP. NO MORE FREAKING TAXES. STOP SPENDING.

Why is this so hard to understand? Why is this so hard to grasp? What is wrong with you people to even think about this as being viable?

It doesn't stop there actually. They will tax movies, and concerts. Oh my! So who does this benefit? NO ONE. So why do it?

You think the stadiums are empty now, wait till they add a tax to those events. The government of Michigan is doing everything they can to obliterate the state. They are doing everything they can to suck the life out of this state. They are doing everything they can to make this state a ghost town.

It has to stop. It's up to you. Do you care?

A mall in Sacramento is banning anyone who wears hoodies, or baggie pants. They claim that criminals wear hoodies and baggie pants - to conceal weapons and hide their identities. Of course they encourage you to buy these items at the mall, you just can't wear them.

Should the mall be allowed to make such rules or should the public wear what they want? Are they going extreme in dictating what people can and can't wear? Should anyone tell you what you can and can't wear out in public? Actually what defines public anymore?

So what if an Islamic person, presumably a woman, comes into the store with her Hijab on? Will she be asked to leave? Doesn't this rule create a path to discrimination?

As a side not, I still call them jogging jackets, because that's what I've called them for years. Who came up with the term hoodies?

Hey while we are at it can we band spandex pants, and ban the low rise pants to block the view of muffin tops please?

I think this would be considered a Pet Peeve, but it's a tad more severe than that. It actually makes me very angry for some reason. I can't peg why exactly, but it just does. Here it is - When people swing their arms up in the air while talking without any regard for people around them. I'm not talking about talking with your hands, I'm talking about swinging your arms up and down or around, because the person has no sense of his or her surroundings.

These are the same people that push a cart through the middle of the aisle way at the store and stop for no reason in the middle. These are the people that drive slow in the fast lane. These are the people that take up the middle of the sidewalk. These are the people that stop as they are walking in a mall and have no idea people are around them. They have no sense of direction, grace, time, or speed. I think yes, it's a combination of all those things.

Stop swinging your arms. Don't drive slow in the fast lane. Have an idea that the world does not revolve around you. Be more productive and stop impeding everyone else. Get with the program or get out.

Hey Clueless Slo Mo, I'm paying attention to you, why can't you pay attention to me. Is it too much to ask? PLEASE WAKE UP before I flatline and you send me to the hospital.

Part of the luster and romance of hockey are the names of the players. Aside from baseball, hockey lends itself to having cool names for players. The French Canadian names, and the European names just roll off your tounge, and scream COOL. However I've noticed that there is something missing in hockey, and that's the famous nicknames of the past.

The Road Runner
The Great One
Super Mario
Boom Boom
The Rocket
Mr. Hockey
The Golden Jet
The Russian Rocket
The Finnish Flash
The Flower
The Little Ball of Hate
King Richard
Mr. Zero
Beezer
The Rat
BlackJack
Cujo
Chico
Tony O
Gump
The Flying Frenchmen
The Triple Crown Line
The GAG Line
Moose
Blackjack
Ace
The Rat

Now the nicknames arent so plentiful. Alex Ovechkin is Alexander the Great, but then again so was Alexander Mogilny. Not cool when you have to share names with someone.

We are stuck with just mini-Canadian-abbreviations of names - Malts for Maltby, Ozzie for Osgood, Chelly for Chelios, Murph for Murphy, Drapes for Dapers. I'm supposed to like this, because it's the Canadian way so I'm told. Well I don't. It reminds me of texting when you shorten words and such to make the sentences easier to type. It drives me NUTS.

I want my nicknames back, and I want them now.

At what point does street vernacular become mainstream? Or at what point does something mainstream, influenced by the media become street vernacular? Who said these things and how did they become everyday things you hear?

Hope it Rocks OUT

Word

Word to your mother

Represent

On the flip side

Working it

Go Girl

Jonesin

Givin it

Fiddy

Let's get stupid

Chillin in the D

Showin some love

This all bothers me for some reason. Perhaps because it's not proper English? Maybe. I use slang often when I speak, even when I write. I'm not opposed to slang, but not when it replaces proper usage of words it's just wrong. I think that's just my style to use slang when appropriate, but never as a replacement. Perhaps the phrases above are just too MTVish..hip hop or gangsta for me to appreciate or embrace them. But that's ok, I don't want to deal with those words. Often I won't even deal with people who use those words.

I was asked what I would do on first day if I was the President:

Ban "LOL" and "LMAO".
Eliminate the IRS.
Abolish the Income tax.
Give Ohio to Canada.
Make Graceland the new White House.
Keep women off the golf course.
Lower business taxes.
Reduce Federal Spending.
Kick out the illegal aliens.
Eliminate NAFTA.
Move the Detroit Lions to L.A.
Get rid of all the czars.
Make special interest group donations to officials illegal.
Make eggplant the official vegetable.
No more free loans to foreign nations.
Turn off MSNBC forever.
Dissolve ACORN.
Hold Wall Street Accountable.
Extradite Barney Frank and Harry Reid to Cuba.
Fire Bob Costas.
Eliminate all human interest stories for any Olympic television coverage.
Ban any cross over of the music industry and sports.
Turn off Twitter.
Ban Myspace.
Make Al Sharpton the ambassador to Tasmania.
Withdraw from the United Nations.
Move the United Nations building to Madagascar.
Move the Red Wings to the Eastern Conference.
Shorten the NHL and NBA regular seasons.
Eliminate Preseason Football.
All touchdown celebrations.
Eliminate the bye week in college football.
Tell the BCS to take a hike.
Make extra point kicks 30 yards.
Move all sports teams out of Atlanta.
Disband the Mighty Ducks.
Make Oprah pay per view with proceeds to charity.
Send Tom Cruise to the moon, permanently.
Make Christmas a week long holiday.
Put my picture on all the money.
Eliminate nose piercings.
Tax tattoos.


There's more that I'd want to do...but this is just day one.

President Obama wins the Nobel peace prize. The first thing that comes to mine is WHAT? WHY? HOW? I ask the main question - What has he done to deserve this? This guy should be next to Martin Luther King, Mother Theresa, and the Dali Lama???

Well he's done NOTHING. Nothing has changed in Iraq or Afghanistan. His hometown of Chicago has crime like you wouldn't believe. No warlords have repented in Africa since his election. So I wonder what's going on??? I wonder if Iran will stop building nukes now?

Then it hits me. It's the Nobel Peace Prize and it means NOTHING. So since he's done nothing, it's perfect! They should change this to the NOTHING PEACE PRIZE.

I had a person tell me that Africa wanted Obama to be president because it was the best chance at world peace. Aside from laughing hysterically at this person; it hit me that they probably vote. I keep forgetting people who don't think are allowed to vote. Yikes!

Another person tells me that he was awarded the prize because of his acceptance speech. What? We give the guy millions of dollars and praise because of a speech? Well in the case I hear by declare this: I want World Peace! Please send me a check or money order for my award. I'm so Obama like.

A friend passed some of this on to me and I hard to share:

The past winners of the award:
Yassir Arafat: This would be the man who diverted billions of dollars into his own Swiss bank accounts that was intended for the Palestinian people. Not only that, but the money that DID happen to get to them, was siphoned off by Hamas, the PLO, Hizbullah, and al Aqsa Martyrs Brigade to be used to kill Israeli's among others.

Mikhail Gorbachev: While Gorby was being bitchslapped by Reagan at Reykjavik, he still had the KGB torturing and killing civilians during his rule. He also kept the Afghan war going for longer and was the first Soviet leader to send troops to Chechnya. He also threatened to squash any revolutions in the Soviet block, although by that time, he lacked any power to actually do it. What a nice guy.

Jimmy Carter: While never really having been responsible for wars directly, Jimmuh is fully responsible for the beginning of the latest wave of Islamic fascism by not stepping up and siding with the Shah of Iran. He may have been a dictator, but he was OUR dictator, and a helluva lot better than the guys who followed, one of which is now pursuing nukes and leading the country. He's sided with Fidel Castro, Hugo Chavez, Augusto Pinochet, Ferdinand Marcos, Manuel Noriega and others...all brutal dictators in their various countries. Joke!

Kofi Annan: Kofi has presided over what can only be described as the largest scandal in the history of the world, but yet, it never made the mainstream media. The oil for food scandal, where various bureaucrats were paid off, or were able to buy and resell items to Saddam Hussein is in the billions of dollars, but has it been on the front page of the NY Slimes? Washington Post? Nah. Why are we still in the United Nations by the way?

Al Gore - Junk science.

Nelson Mandela - A self proclaimed communist. That's peaceful?



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=31nqvyBTWis

Ignore the Nobel Peace Prize, it's a joke. Ignore "What other countries think" statements too. Finally please know that the word "PEACE" means ECONOMIC DISASTER in Norwegian. Let's hope the President can use this as positive leverage somehow (I'm not sure)in world diplomacy. After all this award was a rebuke of Bush's policies, and probably nothing more than that.

I just won Dancing With The Stars.

Never kick a gift horse in the mouth.

So I'm at the grocery store, and I see this display. It's a display full of gift cards for every restaurant and store you can think of. How long have gift cards been around anyways? I know gift certificates have been around forever..but cards maybe 10 years?

Anyways I have a problem with them. I know what you are thinking, geez is there anything this guy doesn't have a problem with? Yeah yeah yeah I know...but let me explain. When you buy a gift card for someone, you are basically telling them how much you are spending on them.

Hey Joe here's a card for $50!..go buy yourself something. Well then every year you are obligated to purchase the same amount if not more. How is that cool? Why not buy something where the other person has no idea what you spent?

Your reasoning is probably because you don't want to spend the time or money on buying something. You don't want to think of anything because you are boring and unimaginative right? I knew it. You are a lazy slacker.

Imagine buying a picture frame as an example. You get it for $5 at the discount store. The person getting the frame has no idea you spent only $5. He's happy as hell with the gift. However if the gift card was for $5 then he'd be upset. Can't you see the issue here?

I say no to the gift card!

Have you ever stopped for a minute to read the latest trend in spam? It's life coaching, life books, and dreams management.

"Achieve your Dreams"
"Follow your Dreams"
"Make your financial dreams come true"
"The keys to being rich in a bad economy"

There's an entire industry that is alive and well. It's full of life coaches, positive speakers, and those who are willing to show you the way for a fee. I personally think the way is sometimes nothing more than people paying someone for advice on how to be positive.

I'm not outright knocking this industry. I'm just very amazed by it. There are tons of people on Facebook for example, who solely exist to sell their Life Coaching services. I don't understand this fully. Do you really learn anything that you don't already know? Can they tell you something that is worth the $200 an hour you are paying them? How many dvds or books must one buy?

I used to know a person that had a shelf full of self-help books. Hundreds of them. How do to this, how to do that, how to succeed at this or that, blank for dummies. You name it, this person had it. However, they were not as I would say very successful. In fact they were the opposite.

So my theory is a certain personality type follows the likes of Tony Robbins. The type that is never happen and moves on from whim to whim at any new vice or fad. This industry thrives on those personality types. Much like the tobacco industry knows addictive personalities will alwys exist.

Or maybe just maybe I trust no one.

The 2009 Detroit Tigers were a sad excuse for a baseball team. First place for the entire season, and then they blow it in the last week. As expected.

So many people are upset about it. But why? If they knew baseball, they'd understand that this team was a fraud since day one. I'm surprised they lasted this long.

Sure I wanted them to win, but I just didn't feel it. I just didn't see it in them. They were just not that good. That lineup had so many holes it wasn't funny.

Most people will blame Leyland. Well, I tell you what. I gave him a bye for most of the season. I knew he had nothing to work with more often than not. No bench, and a bunch of mental Chihuahuas all around. However late in the season he made some moves that just baffled me.

I hate this team. So many holes. No one knows how to work the count. They all swing at the first pitch.

Rodney - He has to go. I can't take him anymore.
Miner - Whats the point?
Seay - The American League has figured him out.
Verlander - I'm still made at his mental errors early in the season.
Inge - He should be a defensive replacement ONLY.
Laird - Great arm, can call a good game. But he has no bat.
Granderson - He's worthless now.
Magz - Later.
Guillen - Useless.
Cabrera - Anyone who thinks we need him, is lying to themselves. We don't need him.
Polanco - Get rid of him.
Thames - Later

Leyland - How this guy managed in the National League all those years and not learn how to manufacture runs is beyond me.

The Twins - That's a great team. Watch how they play baseball. The TWINS way is the right way to play.

With 4 games left they blow a 3 game lead - the first in MLB history. Well there's always the Red Wings, I mean the Lions, I mean the Wolverines. I mean...

And you know what. Now I have to hear from people how proud they are of this team. Proud of what? They LOST! "Well there's always next year". No there is not always next year. This team needs a major re haul. A new GM, and a new manager.

As the NHL season gets underway, I still have these perceptions of teams and cities that just don't seem to go away. I don't if it is from years of watching hockey or out right fan discrimination. Here is what I think of these franchise:

New Jersey Devils - I hate their style and I've still think about how Gretzky called them a Mickey Mouse Franchise way back when.

New York Islanders - I have a hard time taking this team seriously ever. They are so far gone from their Cup years. Still a NY team, so I have to hate them.

New York Rangers - I've never hated the Rangers. An Original Six team is hard to hate. But I don't like them fully, because again they are NY.

Philadelphia Flyers - As a kid I loved the Broad Street Bullies. Pelle Lindbergh was great. Things haven't been the same since Cooperalls came into fashion.

Pittsburgh Penguins - I never liked them, I never will. Can't stand Crosby. Very good sports town though.

Boston Bruins - I like the bad old Bruins of yesterday...O'Reilly, Park, and Co. Gilles Gilbert and Gerry Cheevers were great back in the day. The Bruins and Patriots are the only Boston teams I'll root for. The Celts and Sox can burn in hell.

Buffalo Sabres - I still feel bad they got ripped of in the Cup with that bad goal. Anyways I miss the AUD. Otherwise, they are just there. Gilbert Perrault was sweet. Small market teams are cool.

Montreal Canadiens - My favorite team aside from the Red Wings. Love the history, the passion, the uniforms. I have a chair from the Old Forum. Guy Lafleur, Rejean Houle, Gaston Gingras, Mario Tremblay, Ken Dryden, ...love these guys.

Ottawa Senators - They do nothing for me. Not fan of anything Ottawa.

Toronto Maple Leafs - This baffles. Great city, great tradition, and their ownership has no clue how to run a team. I'd kill to own this team and turn it around. Miss the Garden.

Atlanta Thrashers - The worst sports town in America does not deserve a hockey team. The NHL needs to get them out of there now. Winnipeg needs a team.

Carolina Hurricanes - They bore me. Again, not a fan of southern teams. I like the south [It's a Lincoln thing], but they don't need hockey. You can't turn just left in hockey.

Florida Panthers - What a waste of time. I think of John Vanbiesbrouk...but that's it.

Tampa Bay Lightning - I like the lightning, but hockey should not be in Florida. It's too fricken hot. Screw the transplants. They should have a choice - weather or hockey..not both!

Washington Capitals - Denis Maruk where have you gone? Rod Langway. They do nothing for me. Their fans try...they are cute, but there's nothing here worth talking about. Yeah even that guy doesn't change things.

Chicago Blackhawks - I respect the jersey. Their white jersey is pretty slick. However their fans? Gimme a break. Borderline evil. When this current team learns to play some defense, watch out. I have a piece of concrete from the old Chicago Stadium. Pretty darn sweet.

Columbus Blue Jackets - The Reds are the only Ohio team I will show any respect for. Everyone else can rot away for all I care. Buckeye scum I say.

Detroit Red Wings - I love how they are hated around the league. Love it! Class envy ala the Yankees.

Nashville Predators - Please move this team to Quebec or Kansas City. They don't need this team.

St. Louis Blues - I like the Blues, always have. I still think about Federko and the Sutter Brothers.

Calgary Flames - I don't care for any players on this team, but I like the franchise. I preferred the jerseys before they put black on them.

Colorado Avalanche - There's a fine line between love and hate. I hate this team, but have always loved some of their players. Much like the Yankees. I love Derek Jeter (no, not a man crush) but hate the Yankees. Same thing here.

Edmonton Oilers - These are the Minnesota Twins of hockey. Not much there, but they play the game like it should be played - fast, hard, and with energy. That goes along. I love the Oilers.

Minnesota Wild - Pretty non descriptive as you can get. Hockey is huge in Minnesota, but the pro game is average. I've never understood why. I wish they would be better.

Vancouver Canucks - I like the Canucks. Their ugly V uniforms were great. Much like the Astros of the late 70's.

Anaheim Ducks - With every ounce of my being I hate the Ducks. I hate their name, their jersey, and every player on that team. This represents what is wrong with hockey. The Ducks remind me of Gary Bettman.

Dallas Stars - I don't like this team. I'm not a fan of southern teams, but it's never bothered me that Texas has a team. Minor league hockey is huge there. I just like everything Texas. Must be a Ron Paul thing.

Los Angeles Kings - They Kings are fine. Not a fan of the purple jerseys. But I do like the black and white and the old queen yellow things. The Triple Crown line and 99 are what I think about. Luc.

Phoenix Coyotes - Not a fan. I do not like their jerseys. Most of my friends like it, I think it's lame. Hockey in the desert?

San Jose Sharks - They've grown on me. I was always against them, but I think they are ok to have around. There's no player or past players I identify with on this team.

I went to Catholic school for 11 years. Nuns were a part of my up bringing. So I have first hand experience with the following list that was passed along to me. I've added my brilliant commentary (it's what I do).

This information is for Catholics only. It must not be divulged to non Catholics. The less they know about our rituals and code words, the better off they are. No need to scare anyone else away.

AMEN
The only part of a prayer that everyone knows. Amen to that.

BULLETIN
Your receipt for attending Mass. A few times I've taken a few, in hopes of using them as receipts for future unattended masses. You never know.

CHOIR
A group of people whose singing allows the rest of the Parish to lip-sync or hum.

HOLY WATER
A liquid whose chemical formula is H2OLY. Those who aren't catholic, get burned by touching this.

HYMN
A song of praise usually sung in a key three octaves higher than that of the congregation's range. Nothing worse than standing next to some old man who's been a smoker his whole life who is trying to sing (you know the guy with the white shoes and plaid pants).

RECESSIONAL HYMN
The last song at Mass often sung a little more quietly, since most of the people have already left. The early-sneaker-outers; you know who you are.

INCENSE
Holy Smoke!

JESUITS
An order of priests known for their ability to find colleges with good basketball teams. Not sure what else they do.

JONAH
The original 'Jaws' story. I think we're gonna need a bigger boat..then Noah came along and answered.

JUSTICE
When kids have kids of their own.

KYRIE ELEISON
The only Greek words that most Catholics can recognize besides gyros and baklava.
(For you non-Catholics it means "Lord have mercy.")

MAGI
The most famous trio to attend a baby shower.

MANGER
Where Mary placed Jesus because Joseph forgot the crib when packing the donkey. Way to go Joe!

PEW
A medieval torture device still found in Catholic churches. Sit, Stand, Kneel. Painful.

PROCESSION
The ceremonial formation at the beginning of Mass consisting of altar servers, the celebrant, and late parishioners looking for seats. Everyone looks at these people. Nothing worse than being one of these people either.

RECESSIONAL
The ceremonial procession at the conclusion of Mass led by
parishioners trying to beat the crowd to the parking lot.

RELICS
People who have been going to Mass for so long, they actually know when to sit, kneel and stand. Each church has about 50 of these who are over 90 years old.

STABLE
Where Mary gave birth to Jesus because Joseph wasn't covered by an HMO. The Bible's way of showing us that holiday travel has always been rough.

TEN COMMANDMENTS
The most important Top Ten list not given by David Letterman.

USHERS
The only people in the parish who don't know the seating capacity of a pew. These guys can cram 20 people in a 10 person row. Truly a miracle.

I recently heard that the average time a woman can keep is secret is just 47 hours. That's an average time! Not weeks, months, or years...but 47 hours. I don't recall where I heard this and what the source was; but I remember jotting it down hearing it on the TV news. I was amazed at this.

Do you know anyone that can't keep a secret? What's the point of telling someone a secret if they are most likely not going to keep it anyways. Is this stat going to make you think twice about keeping a secret?

I can keep a secret. I don't like to, but I think about the ramifications. I seen all to often how someone has no clue on how to be tactful or sensitive to others who just don't need to know.

There is politics in conversing. You need to know who to trust, when to trust, and how to trust. Secrets are rarely kept in check, so proceed with caution. Especially apparrently around chicks!

I don't talk sports with chicks, now I can't tell them a secret too? Say it aint so Joe-sephine!

In Michigan there are about 47,000 charities registered with the state. That is crazy nuts! Wow can you imagine that many?

Anyways lately it seems, or perhaps it just me, that charities have increased their attack (and I mean that nicely) on raising money. Everyone is walking for this, and walking for that, or running for this, or running for that. I'll get invitations to donate, to attend charity events, and fund raisers. I get emails, letters in the mail, phone calls etc. It never ends and it's driving me crazy.

Do I get angry? No I don't. Not like I would at a salesman or telemarketer. Why? Because I genuinely believe in the concept of a charity, and fighting for a cause. However I'm tapped out. What really bothers me is saying no. If I could say yes, I would..but I just can't do it. If I did, I would be working full time giving away all I have to a charity. It just doesn't jive. Do I feel guilty in saying no? No, not at all...because the reality is I just can't do it. The person usually asking me for time or money doesn't understand, but they need to. There's just too much going on.

That being said, I really admire people who do charity work and take the time to sponsor events and try to raise money. They care, and that's great.

My friend Darlene from Canada eh, is doing a marathon run in Greece (42k) for diabetes. Her daughter has diabetes and she's going to run for and raise money in doing so. Good stuff and that's something I could really support.

Hmmm...my friend Irish Guy is diabetic, and the other day I gave him an apple pie. I guess that wasn't very charitable of me??? Ooops!

RINO - Republican In Name Only

Who are these Republicans? There's many. Sarah Palin, John McCain, Lindsey Graham, Mitt Romney..etc. There are many of them who are just statists; believe in big government, and are ok with big business sleeping with the Govt no matter the cost to the people. Like many politicians on both sides of the corridor; they are in the pockets of special interest groups. So sad.

The magazine Human Events lists the top 10 RINOs. Republicans who vote with the democrats more often than not on many issues. Money talks?

Top 10 Senators
Sen. Olympia Snowe (Maine)
Sen. Susan Collins (Maine)
Sen. Arlen Specter (Pennsylvania)
Sen. George Voinovich (Ohio)
Sen. Lisa Murkowski (Alaska)
Sen. Mel Martinez (Florida)
Sen. John McCain (Arizona)
Sen. Richard Lugar (Indiana)
Sen. Robert Bennett (Utah)
Sen. Thad Cochran (Mississippi)

Top 10 House of Reps
Rep. Christopher Shays (Connecticut)
Rep. Michael Castle (Delaware)
Rep. Sherwood Boehlert (New York)
Rep. Mark Kirk (Illinois)
Rep. Jim Kolbe (Arizona) (tied for 5th)
Rep. Rob Simmons (Connecticut) (tied for 5th)
Rep. Wayne Gilchrest (Maryland) (tied for 7th)
Rep. Jim Leach (Iowa) (tied for 7th)
Rep. Mary Bono (California) (tied for 9th)
Rep. Nancy Johnson (Connecticut) (tied for 9th)

RINOS should make you mad if you voted for them. They are not representing what you wanted. Do something.

Wayne County, Michigan

Wayne County, MI spends $50,000 on a bear statue. Perfect timing for considering the shape of the economy. I took the liberty to write the dude in charge of Parks and stuff. Here's the discourse.

Again, as I've said for years. Most public officials are simply out of touch with reality. This is another example!



__________________________________
From: HockeyDino
Date: Thu, Oct 1, 2009 at 7:52 PM
Subject: Re: $50,000 for Statue?
To: Edward Boike

You lied Ed! You responded with a silly excuse. You sir are silly for not recognizing common sense and decency when it comes to public funds. Have you no soul or sense of what is right?

It's going to be great for all those jobless folks to sit by the shade of that $50,000 statue of a bear! How wonderful. But hey, you get your symbolism that's for sure.

Your response is disgusting.
___________________________________

Thu, Oct 1, 2009 at 8:34 AM,
Edward Boike wrote:
I'm not responding with a silly excuse. Certainly not as silly as your ridiculous statements. This was paid for by my parks mileage dollars and had to be used for parks and recreation. Thank you Edward A. Boike Jr.

____________________________________

HockeyDino
9/29/2009 8:55:40 PM
The county spends $50,000 on a statue of a bear. Are you freaking
kidding me????

Are you that out of touch with reality? Does the phrase "28% unemployment rate" mean anything to you? How do you sleep at night? How many families could use that money? How many part time jobs could you have saved or created?

Please do not respond and waste my time. You've already wasted my time,
and my money. An apology, or a stupid reason (because really there is
NOTHING you could say to make this justifiable) is not necessary. You sir
should be ashamed of yourself.

Where can I petition to have funds allocated for a statue in honor of the
Wayne County Administration? I'd like to have a statue of a bunch of clowns.

Whatever,

Dino

I had to get some paperwork information transferred on my vehicle. I was informed by the lender I had to pay $15. I wasn't happy about it. I was also informed I would have to go to the Secretary of State to get it done. WHAT! NO! SAY IT AINT SO!

I could not mail this. I could not do this online. They could not do it for me. No, we put people on the moon, we transplant hearts, we can talk to people via webcam across the world. But to transfer a title on your car you need to go to the dreaded Secretary of State. For the love of God why???? WHY ME?!!

Can someone please change this? Why is this acceptable? There has to be an alternative. There is nothing worse than having to go to the Secretary of State. Long lines, weird people, and they are always dirty offices. When you walk in, it's instant depression. None of the workers ever smile either.

So I decide to go in the middle of the afternoon thinking maybe, just maybe there will not be many people there. I was wrong. There were 42 people in line when I got in. Oh death, thy name is WAITING!

Thank God for my significant other Miss Blackberry to keep me sane. I was wondering how many hours I've spent during my life in this god forsaken place over the years? I'll never get that time back. Secretary of State and 8 years of Detroit Lions season tickets. God hates me.

Some people say next to the airport that's the best place to people watch. I say, I don't want to look at anyone. It was very aggravating. Weird people. Sad people. And as always half the people in line didn't speak English, so the teller had to explain things 5 times to each of them. Not to mention just when you think you are next; 5 people pop up from a desk somewhere after taken some stupid test and jump in front of you.

By the way, what the heck does the Secretary of State do anyways? Seems like they have way too many forms and paperwork to make things more complicated. The forms section is loaded with papers on end. What? You say you do things online or mail? Nice try...it didn't work for me anytime I tried. I hate them.

If Obama would have eliminated these places, I would have voted for him easily. There is nothing worse than the Secretary of State. NOTHING!